Some more Pointless rambling

Time for some more pointless rambling. I'm not entirely sure why I do this. Maybe it helps me in the long run. Maybe people actually read it. Who knows. My last post was pretty negative. I should probably apologize for that, to the people who may or may not actually care. I'm sorry. I was upset, I wasn't thinking, and I most assuredly am not THAT angry about it. It's just I really care a lot for her, and had been really hoping that things would actually work out with her. She's one of the few positive things that's happened to me since my ex. She's also one of the few chicks I can REALLY talk to, really open up to. I'm going to stick with it though, as her friend. If down the road she feels comfortable with dudes again and hasn't grown completely sick of me as most women seem to, then hey...maybe something can happen. At this point I'm reallllllly trying to not hope against hope that it will, because if nothing does it's going to suck. A lot. So I'm actually trying to be negative about it in a way. That's a good way to live right? Right? Yea that's got to be it. 0_0

I'ma be the best damn friend I can be. Unless she grows tired and finds all cool new friends at U of I, in which case I'll do what I'm second best at after waiting for people...Fade into the background and just disappear.

Boy that's a downer huh?

Sure is...